A Wonderful Poem By My Sister-In-Christ

This poem is so beautiful and shows me how God has gifted us each differently. Enjoy!

I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked.
Psalm 84:10


The Sanctuary
By Jen H.


Weekly and weak
I return to this shore. Baffled,
Yet balmed to see

Brash sand sculptors mock the tide
With its too-soon waves
That lap, then leave, and lap again,

Till all is lost and
The barren shore rests
Flat, yet moist--

No trace of craft enduring,
Save in soul clay
Kingdom-bent.

Here, in the swish and grime
Bare toes, dizzied, curl tight,
Re-righting their stance at the rim of majesty.

A chin shakes; knees quake.
Ears --and fears—pop! Deafened by the din
Of rattled hearts and cancelled sin.

The world’s crimes hang clean
And sweet as slips on wash day.
The wind whips through and through,

Sets all in proper place--
Such rare force, grace--
God stretches; I shrink.

The ceiling’s not where I think,
Here, where chalk writing leaves
Indelible ink.

I'm actually copying something from my sister-in-Christ Jennifer's blog:

On the first day of orientation, our medical director drew a diagram like so:

high expectations---------------------
disappointment
reality-----------------------------
JOY
lower expecations----------------

He said that high expectations in life- with others, with yourself, with circumstances- causes all kinds of problems, and often leaves us disappointed..sometimes feeling ripped off from our previous feelings of entitlements. So what we need to do it simply lower our expectations ...and when things go better than expected, just be glad in it. Because in the end, we always have more than we deserve. And this is reality.

Now Kerstin speaking: I definitely have found this to be true. I definitely have seen in me, my kids, and others around me the thoughts that things should be perfect--I mean, I deserve it good. Carl has definitely shown me in the Bible how I don't deserve anything good, but that God made it possible for me to have everything good in Him. But I shouldn't expect good or feel entitled to it apart from Him.

Formal Portrait

Here is a silhouette page I did of the kids. I'm using it for cards and got all four framed and hung above our stairs.

Tahoe, Truckee, and More Cute Photos

We had the opportunity to go to friends' cabin in Truckee. We hiked, the kids got muddy...lots of fun!



We spent most of Tuesday at Lake Tahoe. It was amazingly beautiful! What a creative God we have.


Yes, I did go swimming with Hanna and Maggie--it felt as if we were swimming in snow. My children must take after their Opa because they don't care how cold the water is--they go in!
On the way back to the cabin from Lake Tahoe, Trey took one bite of his pretzel and then...this!


The kids got their portrait taken at Sears for Grandma and Grandpa, and then I did a private photo shoot!

Congratulations Jennifer!

I am so excited because my dear sister-in-Christ, Jennifer, has graduated from medical school! She was chosen to give a speech and was able to share the Gospel openly. Here is what she said:

Good morning. My name is Jennifer (edit.), and it is my pleasure to be here today

What I want to share with you this morning is something very simple. It is a story of redemption through the eyes of a medical student. And I pray this will bless you.

My story begins with a very sick heroine addict who was my patient. Let’s say her name was Rachel. She was a thin woman, with knotted unwashed hair, and areas where her muscle had wasted away from her heroine injection sites. She was homeless, her family had disowned her. She had out of control untreated hepatitis C- and this infection was likely going to kill her.

Every day a quiet man would visit her. I found out that he was her husband of many years, the father of her children before heroine took over her life. It seemed that she had treated him badly, so we were shocked that he had come back for her over and over again. However it occurred to me that he deeply loved her.

As I consider Love, I remember that there is a mighty God who created me. He gives every breath and heartbeat as a gift. I owe my life to him. And He desires to have a love relationship with me, as well as with all of you. Like this husband, God has this crazy loyal Love for us.

And there’s more. You see, I am like Rachel. I also am very sick. The Bible says all people are born with sin, a darkness in our hearts that compels us to run away from God. And this sin is just like an infection that will inevitably kill us no matter how good we try to be.

The Bible says that the consequences for sin is death. It’s a spiritual death- divorce from the source of life, God. We are in need of saving because our souls have a death sentence.

You thought I was going to talk about something positive, right? But this all sounds like bad news. The good news is that God has a plan for saving our lives.

When I was a freshman medical student I spent two weeks working with babies born with heart defects, several of whom needed heart transplants. It was sobering to realize that the only way for them to live was for another child to die. It reminded me of how God chose to save all of us. By substitution. He offers us heart transplants through his sinless son, Jesus Christ.

There is giant cross that lights up at night on the medical center, it’s a statement that Jesus died on a cross in our place, as a substitution for a death that sinners deserved. And he did this so we could be freely forgiven of our sins and be reunited with him forever. He did this because of His crazy Love for us.
So many years ago, I came to God as a sick woman, in need of saving, and I laid down my broken life, and he gave me new one. It is free to me but it cost him everything. This is the gospel.

Tomorrow, I will graduate as physician. And of everything in this world that I know, this is what I have learned is most important.

Thank you.

A Very Happy Birthday to Me!

We went to Hendy Woods for my birthday...a few days of camping in the woods. It was so peaceful and beautiful. Our trailer was next to an enormous redwood that had fallen down. The stump was big enough for the kids to play house in. There were several empty sites around us with redwood stumps and a tree that arched so the kids could climb on it. Someone had also put a rope swing from the arch. It was a big playground! The first evening we went for a hike through Little Hendy. My birthday began with a trip to the bathroom with Trey, where he exclaimed in delight over all the moths. He blew on them trying to get them to fly. When we reentered the trailer, we were greeted with 3 smiling girls and Carl--they had set the table with cards and gifts. Maggie and Lily had picked wildflowers. It was all super thoughtful and sweet. Some of the cards and gifts actually caused me to tear up. :)

We had a leisurely day, going for another hike down to the Navarro River. We went from redwoods to the river bed--with a view of the vast hills and sky. There were such unique stones in the river bed. The kids wanted to immediately go in (of course) even though it wasn't really warm. They all did! We roasted hot dogs and marshmellows. The kids really enjoyed feeding the chipmunks breadcrumbs and watching them dart around with big cheeks.

The last day we went for a hike to Big Hendy. There were enormous trees and roots from those trees that had fallen. It started to rain, but the peace and stillness was intense. We hiked back through a meadow with wildflowers in every color imaginable. Glorious! I so enjoyed the beauty of God's creation and sharing it with those dearest to me.



My rock for Carl:

The Navarro River



Our campsite:



Hanna en pointe as Templeton in Charlotte's Web with Lily as a baby spider.

Dragging...

I sometimes feel a dragging in my spirit...like things aren't going well or I'm not sure how they should be going but it's not feeling great. This can be partly due to relationships, physical realities, or any number of combined factors. A really big problem starter is a lack of time reading the Bible and praying--talk about lack of focus. I can see these feelings/perspectives influence my social skills, parenting, and my marriage. I read a great quote from a book about marriage called What Did You Expect?? by Paul David Tripp. He writes, "You both bring something into your marriage that is destructive to what a marriage needs and must do. That thing is called sin." Tripp says that sin is "essentially antisocial. We don't really have time to love our spouse...because we are too busy loving ourselves." We change our spouses into "vehicles to help us get what we want or obstacles in the way of what we want." But encouragement and hope exist: God's grace "is meant to bring you to the end of yourself so that you will finally begin to place your identity, your meaning and purpose, and your inner sense of well-being in him." (partially quoted from World, June 5, 2010, p. 31)

Good conviction for my dragging spirit!