When it gets right down to it, I feel connected to those who I know their continual struggles and they know mine. Do their continual complaints weigh me down? Depends. If it is shared in a "life stinks and it is always stinky" way, sure. But if it is shared in a "here I am again...please pray with me/for me/help me find some encouragement through all this" then no. I definitely hear what you're saying about not speaking words that don't edify and give grace. That definitely falls in the first category "stinky, always stinky" sharing. Sometimes we do that and need more prayer. But the words of "this is me today" are opening the door to be edified/edify. Otherwise, it is difficult to know each other and impossible to be able to edify or give grace. I wonder sometimes where I'm at with someone (they act funky) and don't know that they are feeling poorly, or that they had a spat with their husband, or that they just got their period.... I tend to be an "this is me" communicator, and I wonder sometimes if that person really needed to hear/cared to hear about my lack of sleep or my period. I struggle with the balance of sharing my life in a way that is helpful for relationships--should I tell them how I am feeling and struggling, or just say, "God is always good and is giving me strength" which is true as well? I suppose both are necessary for true communication. I also believe that consistency is a key. If I am connected to someone by spending time/communication with them frequently, we are definitely able to pray and encourage each other more--and understand whatever is going on in that person's life because we KNOW each other. This also opens the door for understanding, prayer, and more fellowship of His sufferings as we get to spend time in the same place, same time for however long the Lord has it.
It is a struggle to know how much to share and with whom. The Lord definitely had his "lonely" times (Mark 1) with his Father. Obviously God is our one with whom we should share the most intimate and all our struggles. But Jesus also had this group of guys that were always with him, almost all the time. They were supposed to encourage/learn from/pray with him--and later we see how they ministered and were knit together and forced apart to minister elsewhere. It is really in Acts and in the Epistles that we read more about what the church was like or should be like. It is how we love each other that the world will see Jesus. But how can we love each other when we barely know each other beyond the surface? I think it needs to come from time and consistency.
This isn't totally on topic, but the verse of the week for me is 2 Corinthians 9:8! Check it out:
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
Amy Carmichael wrote that she heard this verse preached but was too far in the back and couldn't hear much of what the preacher said except, "All....all...all....all...all." :)
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